Why Do We Suffer?

This question is asked a thousand times a day in the hospital setting, which is the environment in which I work. I have heard the agonizing cries of a mother who is losing a child. I have seen what intractable pain looks like in the eyes of a person whose body has endured severe trauma. My personal experiences, and those of others who I have witnessed, beg the questions: What is the nature of suffering and why must we endure it?

Some think that we suffer to teach us humility. I doubt this. Some believe that suffering is how God punishes us for our sinful and fallen natures. I think that’s bullshit. Some believe that we suffer because God is indifferent to our pain. Again, I don’t think so. Truthfully, I don’t know why humans suffer, but I’m pretty sure no one else knows, either.

When we are born into this world, suffering is part of the deal. It is how we cope with it, and how we help each other through it, that ultimately defines our humanity. What I have observed is that, individually, we can find meaning in our suffering. We can grapple with the deeper questions of personal experiences. Also, we can share the burdens of others out of solidarity and love. Suffering may be an enigma, yet how we endure it can be quite straight forward.

It is important to view suffering through an ethical lens, which shows us three important truths:

• First, we are responsible for assisting those who are actively suffering. We can accompany them, witness them, and perhaps ease their struggle in some way. The gifts of humor, presence, distraction, and joy can make the swell of suffering ebb, if only for a moment of respite.

• Second, we are all responsible for not intentionally causing suffering to anyone, including ourselves. This is not to say that we never hurt each other and ourselves. People can love each other and hurt each other, too. But it is unacceptable to act in a way that causes suffering, knowing full well what we are doing.

• Third, on a global level, we are all responsible for creating social, political, and economic structures that alleviate systemic suffering. This is done through formal apologies, financial reparations and other resourcing of historically disadvantaged communities, environmental restoration, and story-sharing. Humans need to do better in preventing and repairing wide-spread suffering through justice and kindness.

My belief is that on “the other side of the veil,” all will be revealed. We will understand the point, perhaps, when our spirits have returned to Source. But while we are here in incarnational space, we must hold each other, comfort each other, and protect each other and ourselves. There may not be an end of suffering here on Earth, but in our suffering we can draw closer to each other, and be salve for each other’s souls.